Just Venting

Forgive me please if I vent just a bit. This seems as good a place as any to get something off my chest.
I haven’t been able to express my feelings lately without criticism or judgment but I don’t feel so vulnerable here.

I have become increasingly discouraged by the lack of genuine brotherly love within my church. I feel overburdened by rules and legalism. They set standards that God does not even set for His children and when I don’t measure up I am accused of not being obedient or my faith is questioned. We are always hearing lectures about brotherly love and that we are all a part of God’s family but we don’t act like a family. There is really no outreach. I was a member of a Sunday school class for two years and never got a phone call or a visit to my home. I took on the responsibility of making new friends and inviting myself to the socials. But after a year I joined another class. The teacher had the nerve to tell me I offended them by leaving their class and forsaking their fellowship.
When I have expressed my opinion about the rigid standards I have been accused of distorting scripture.
It irritates me that some of the mega-churches in this denomination put on these HUGE evangelism outreach events and don’t even mention repentance of sin but yet bring in hundreds because they are promised love, peace, and happiness (why don’t they tell them about the persecution, trials & troubles?) There was no evangelism outreach at my church so I asked permission to introduce one – they took the material but wouldn’t let me do the class because I am a woman. So, I invited some ladies to go share the gospel at a festival. When I shared my testimony with a stranger, one of the ladies (who by the way refused to approach anyone)criticized me for not following a “formula”.
Another thing that bothers me is the superiority and arrogance. I constantly hear criticism of other denominations. They have a problem with Methodists, Presbyterians, Catholics, pretty much everyone but them. I thought that the Lord said that whatever He has cleansed we are not to call unclean and, who are we to judge another man’s servant? I am tired of hearing how we are not worthy of anything. To me this is just false humility. That attitude may be why they look so sour. We were unworthy but He has called us into His family, we are heirs to the kingdom of God. I would feel terrible if my children had a constant feeling of worthlessness. I wonder how our Lord must feel when we put ourselves down.
I have been visiting other churches for the past few weeks. I recently had a conversation with a friend who wanted to know why I have been visiting other churches. I told her I was tired of being run down by other Christians and legalistic standards. I told her I was tired of the judgmental attitudes and the attacks on my faithfulness. I told her I was tired of my church family discounting my experiences and telling me I am making it up and pretending the problem doesn’t exist. I told her I was lonely and worn down because I can’t measure up to the standards and man made regulations they set but don’t help bear. I told her I was tired of the superior, arrogant attitude. She asked me where I was going Sunday and I told her I might go to the Methodist church down the road.
She said, “ Well, I’m sorry you feel that way but, I don’t think anyone here in our church is like that at all and don’t go to a Methodist church they don’t believe the same things we do!!!”

What angers me is not how I’ve been treated – I’ve suffered much worse. It’s that I see this treatment and attitude throughout God’s family. It seems that not very many Christians actually treat each other as brother and sister. It is merely lip service because we know it’s what we are supposed to act like. I am ashamed because I have been guilty of the same superior attitude at one time. I genuinely grieve for the body of Christ because we waste our time bickering with one another instead of carrying the gospel to those who need it. Sometimes, we not only hide our light but we snuff out the light of each other.